KSI knocked out Swarmz in the second round of their internet celebrity boxing fight today at London’s O2 Arena, and followed it up a few hours later with a third round stoppage of extremely low-level professional boxer Luis Alcaraz Pineda.
The KSI vs Swarmz was, being honest, pretty terrible. But it was nothing compared to the Pineda fight, which saw the “pro boxer,” now 2-6, fumble around the ring, try to avoid contact, and then repeatedly do the same thing: Eat a body shot, wait for a head shot to come in after, try to duck into it in a way that made it a rabbit punch, and then complain to the referee.
Pineda was down three times in the first round, twice in the second, and twice more in the third before the referee finally called an end to the farcical mess, which was easily the most embarrassing fight on a show filled with “influencers” and YouTube stars. Pineda almost surely was not hurt as much as you’d think given the amount of knockdowns, but his attempt to get a DQ win or whatever also indicates he had no intention of actually trying to win.
Swarmz, a British rapper, had reportedly never put on a pair of gloves before stepping in on short notice a couple of weeks ago. He also had to lose 12kg (about 26 lbs), reportedly, and somehow these things were marketed as selling points.
But it was clear within seconds of the opening bell that Swarmz had no clue what he was doing in a boxing ring, and while KSI is not exactly a boxing genius, he’s trained much longer and much more seriously than Swarmz, and it showed.
Swarmz was reduced mainly to running around the edges of the ring in terror, spinning cluelessly and occasionally throwing some of the worst punches you’ll ever see in a ring, looking like a pro wrestler “missing a clothesline” on a couple of them that seemed to be aimed at someone roughly Tyson Fury’s height.
Swarmz was dropped in the first round, though it wasn’t exactly clean technique or highlight reel-worthy. He managed to survive that round, but was huffing and puffing in the corner, and KSI put him down again early in round two, with Swarmz happy to take the 10 count for the knockout. He was fully aware of his surroundings and all, he was just done.
“He was moving quite a bit. He was doing little twirly spin-arounds and stuff,” KSI said after the great triumph. “I’m ready for my next one. It’s good to be back.”
“Obviously, I had 20 days to lose 12 kg. But if anyone wants it, any YouTubers, I’m ready,” Swarmz said after his inspiring performance.
- Deen the Great TKO-1 Evil Hero: I don’t know who these people are, but honestly, this just looked like a skilled prospect against a dude who is there to fight him. Deen can actually box a little, you’ll see iffier looking prospects on any Top Rank or Matchroom or PBC or Golden Boy show. If this dude has any reason to bother, yeah, he could make a go at boxing.
- Sam Hyde TKO-3 IAmThmpson: It was not ... good. Both did narrowly avoid vomiting, so they have that going for them. The finish came after a pair of standing eight counts, rare in real boxing but probably useful here.
- Salt Papi TKO-1 Andy Warski: Warski came out squared up like a kid in third grade trying to stand up to his bully, got smacked with two left hands, and that was it, he was done. He complained about the stoppage — which came in 29 seconds — but he really shouldn’t have been allowed to continue, and the referee got it right. Salt Papi was also announced as “The Fighting Pride of the Philippines,” which is absurd enough that you have to respect it.
- King Kenny MD-4 FaZe Sensei: Scores were 38-38, 39-38, and 39-37, the latter two both for King Kenny, so that gives him the majority decision win. There was some conversation on the broadcast about a standing eight count against Kenny not being counted for a 10-8 first round, but that’s not “automatic” in amateur boxing, and the “sanctioning” of this event was done through a company that mainly does amateur fights. Also, I don’t care. I do want to say that both of these guys were well above the average skill level for this “influencer” boxing thing. It’s always very quickly clear who at least has taken some basic training seriously and who hasn’t, and both of these guys have.
- Deji TKO-3 Fousey: A dominant performance from Deji, KSI’s brother, as Fousey never really got out of the starting blocks here and wound up with a bloody nose and an eye swollen pretty much shut. Deji scored a knockdown in round two and a standing eight in the third, and then Fousey’s corner threw the towel, which was the right move.
- Slim Albaher TKO-2 FaZe Temperrr: Sloppy and ugly boxing/fighting, but they both threw their hands, and Albaher had an actual sort of awkwardness for the level that made him a bit much for Temperrr, who got drilled with a right hook to end things in the second round. He got up, to his great credit, but it was over there for sure. It was a good shot, a real highlight for the show.